


Why does it hurt to be near you?

by cottage_core_whore, whorefordracomalfoy777



Category: Harry Potter - J. K. Rowling, Yo Gabba Gabba (TV)
Genre: Babygorl, British, Character Death, Deviates From Canon, Don't Examine This Too Closely, Don't Read This, Enemies to Lovers, F/F, F/M, Gen, Jealousy, M/M, Multi, Other, Why Did I Write This?, dumbledore is freaky, no beta we die like men, tw: snape
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-02-13
Updated: 2021-02-12
Packaged: 2021-03-13 01:00:01
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence, Major Character Death
Chapters: 1
Words: 957
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29393733
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/cottage_core_whore/pseuds/cottage_core_whore, https://archiveofourown.org/users/whorefordracomalfoy777/pseuds/whorefordracomalfoy777
Summary: Y/n is in her 6th year at Hogwarts School of Witchcraft and Wizardry. Ever since she was a first-year, she's been pining for Ron Weasley, but after a freak incident in the Great Hall, y/n catches the eye of the prince of Slytherin, Draco Malfoy. Y/n struggles with her love for Ron, and the undeniable chemistry between her and Malfoy. Will she survive her 6th year, or will she be torn apart by two worlds fighting for her attention?
Relationships: Cedric Diggory/Reader, Draco Malfoy/Reader, Hermione Granger/Harry Potter/Ron Weasley, Ron Weasley/Reader
Comments: 6
Kudos: 3





	Why does it hurt to be near you?

**Author's Note:**

  * For [River_Sings](https://archiveofourown.org/users/River_Sings/gifts).



> TW: Hufflepuffs, major character death, gory details, possessive Draco, Babygorl.
> 
> These are all my own ideas and thoughts, please don’t repost!!! All rights reserved to me, if you think JK Rowling had any part in this, no you don’t. Hope you like the fic!! ENJOY :)

Y/n opened her eyes to the bright yellow light of the Hufflepuff dormitory. She could smell the buns from the ovens in the kitchen wafting into her cozy, cottage-core room. She stepped out of bed, threw on her Sunflower Vol. 6 T-shirt that Snape had tried to confiscate in 3rd year, and brushed her effortless golden curls into a perfect messy bun. She stared into the mirror, her cerulean orbs staring back at her, and thought with a sad sigh, I’ll never be pretty enough for Ron Weasley, he’s in love with those stupid, fat whores Hermione and Harry. 

Y/n ran down the yellow brick Hufflepuff stairs into the common room and ran into a wall. But no, y/n thought, that’s no wall, that’s a nice hunk of abs. Y/n looked up into the emerald green orbs of Cedric Diggory. 

“Watch where you're going tits.”

y/n blushed, “C-c-cedric, I-I didn’t see you and your Rasputin pickle there. I-I-I’m so sorry.”

“That’s okay, want to go out with me?”

Y/n was going to say no (because cedric is ugly and fat and I hate him and he’s stupid and its his fault he died), but she wasn’t like most girls, she was clever. She thought that going out with Cedric might make Ronald jealous, and see how fugly his friends are , and how he has to leave them.

Y/n looked up with a determined and fiery look in her eyes and said, “Yes Cedric, I would be happy to. Tonight at the Three Broomsticks, 6 o’clock.”

“Wear something sexy or I’ll leave.”

“Fuck you, you’re the one who asked bitch. Now get the fuck out of my way before I hex you. I need to go to breakfast before those house-elves put the food away.”

Y/n made a B-line to the Great Hall and sat at the Hufflepuff table facing the glowing, perfect, hot-as-hell, and mysteriously handsome Ron Weasley.

Y/n stared into the gorgeous, freckled face of the most beautiful man she had ever seen. 

“Omg y/n, you’re such a simp”, her friend, Marge Huckleboot, said. To y/n’s surprise, right at that moment, Ron looked up from his big ass chicken stick straight into her staring eyes, like a deer in the headlights. Y/n gasped in surprise and sharted. She ducked under the table and sat between Marge’s thicc legs. 

“Omg did he see me????” Marge clapped her cheeks in response. “He sure did, sugarplumbearsweetiepoopoopogchamp.” 

Y/n felt a flutter in her kidney. “Aw fuck Marge, I think I’m having an organism.”

That must’ve scared Marge, because she began burping really loudly, which is what happened when she was nervous.

(For context - Marge has had a crush on y/n forever, but y/n doesn’t like her back because she hates fat lesbians.)

“Marge, you crazy lesbian. I can’t believe you’re burping again. This makes me feel a lot better about myself now, thanks you dumb bitch.” And with that, y/n sat back up at the bench. When she looked back at the Gryffindor, Ron was still looking, which made y/n scream. Out of fear and embarrassment, y/n whipped out the AK47 she always kept stored in the back pocket of her robes, right next to her emergency spaghetti in case Marge’s blood sugar got too low. With her favorite AK, bedazzled with black and yellow gems, she shot Ron right in the belly button. Now I don’t have to worry about having any more of those pesky little organisms.

Hermione screamed in terror and Harry sighed in relief “Finally that stupid fatass is gone, now I can bone Hermione without having to suck his dick at the same time.” Everybody in the Great Hall stared at the exploded carcass, entrails dripping all over the walls, blood seeping into the gutters. Then they kept eating the queen’s corgis (lmao British people).

Y/n began to cry, wow…. I can’t believe they forgot the cream for my tea. Stupid enslaved house-elf bitches.

Marge nodded in agreement, “Yeah, they’re kinda hot though don’t you think?”

“What the fuck Marge, of course you’d say that you kinky homo.”

\+ + +

As Draco sat in his jet black, sexy ass suit, he couldn’t help but grin as he watched Ron getting blown to bits.

**in sexy Simon Cowell accent** “Thank Merlin I don’t have to deal with fucking Weaslebee any longer.”

Crabbe and Goyle laughed because if they don’t, Draco’s father will in fact hear about it.

As Draco sat and watched y/n, he saw the light refracting off her golden locks and her bright orbs glowing with joy as she took the life from that fucking blood-traitor cunt. 

“Holy fuck, she’s so hot and sexy, I can’t believe I never realized before…” Draco thought. “Crabbe, Goyle, I need you to chip her so I can track her location at all times.”

“But, isn’t that like, a violation of the Geneva Convention™?” Crabbe asked.

“How the fuck do you know what that is?? Have you been reading??”

“No sir, never I-”

Malfoy grabbed Crabbe’s neck and snapped it like a paper wand. Crabbe’s body fell to the floor, and Goyle looked on sympathetically.

“Now Goyle, I need you to chip y/n for me so I can be controlling and domineering.”

Goyle nodded obediently, Naruto Running™ back to the Slytherin common room to get the deer chipping and tracking device he stole from his uncle’s biology lab where they do biology stuff.

Draco looked back to where y/n was throwing boiling hot tea on that fattass Marge. He smirked deviantly, I got you now babygorl.

TW: YOU JUST GOT BABY GORLED.

https://www.pinterest.ph/pin/51580358222082623/

**Author's Note:**

> First chapter of many. My friend and I are writing this together and there is no set schedule for posting at the time being. I hope you all enjoyed this chapter and look forward to the drama to further unfurl. Recommend to anyone and everyone! Love you all! :)


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